During the SF Giants World Series Parade I caught my mom staring at somebody's kid with that, "I wish I was Grandmother" , look.
Point blank, my mom wants grandkids, even so she once bribed me saying she would set aside a trust fund for a future grandkid.
Its not that I don't want kids, I just refuse to bring a kid into this world with no financial stability to support them. If I did want a kid, I would want to give the world to them, which means giving them everything so they could have a normal childhood.
I've been doing stand up comedy for 10 years and lets just say, if I had to support a kid on what I've made, not only would they have been taken away from me the state, they probably would have starved too. And I probably would have taken them on the road with me because I'm too cheap to rent a babysitter.
I know some people reading this blog would say, well then maybe its time to stop doing comedy and get a real job. That's so cliche. Thats not a bad idea but how many parents out there have already gave up their dreams so they could raise a family, I'll tell you, a lot.
So for me, having a kid and not giving up my entertainment career is a must.
When I saw an old friend this past year and we talked about having kids, I made it clear that I didn't want to feel obligated, which is another reason why I don't want kids.
I guess I'm a commitment-phobe. And I don't want to feel committed unless the situation is right.
This blog is truly how I feel and I'm 99% sure I've pissed off my woman readers, especially the single mothers. So before any of them or anyone else starts passing judgement, I like to think I wrote this blog with some sense of self-responsibility.
I'm not one of these people who bring human beings into this world and try to wing it as best as possible. I see people like that all the time riding the bus, in line at the grocery store, or at Wendy's sharing fries with their toddlers. And thats cool, to each their own but thats not how I roll.
Right now, I've been in the entertainment game for 10 years and I still have yet to break into the big money, whereas I see other performers who I started with have made those strides.
I don't carry any these worries on my shoulders, I just try to live life as best I can without the stress and hope everything works out the way I intended it to, which as it turns out, is taking longer then expected.